Years ago during my first job in corporate America, I experienced firsthand the power of presence. There was a woman in my department that everyone referred to as “Crazy Mary.” I thought such a reference was uncalled for until I had an experience with her. One day she called me into her office to review the progress I was making with a project she had assigned to me. She was more than cordial as we discussed my work and reviewed the milestones of the project. I remember thinking as I left her office how kind and considerate she had been.

Then the very next day, she came to my cubicle and demanded that I follow her immediately to her office. When I entered her office, she slammed the door and began to yell and belittle me for the very accomplishments that she had complimented me for the previous day. From then on, I began to recognize the subtle anger and seething frustration that lurked just below the surface of her congenial demeanor. It made sense that everyone feared and avoided her at all costs. I continued to observe her emotional outbreaks that spanned the spectrum from Dr. Jekyll to Mrs. Hyde until I left the company.

Last year when I wrote the piece entitled, “How Do You Strengthen Your Presence?” I stated that presence was the “the vibe, energy, frequency, or power that emanates from us.” Shortly thereafter, a magazine editor wrote me a note and told me that she thought that I knew more about presence than I was telling. She challenged me to write more on the topic when time permitted, so here I go.

I agree with Aristotle who said that to be a good speaker, a person has to be a good person. There are plenty of great speakers out there. They are very articulate, seem to choose exactly the right words, and they really know how to turn a phrase. And yet, when it comes to touching our hearts, moving us to action, and providing us with a larger vision of who we are and what we can become, their message can seem hollow. There is something that seems to be missing or just doesn’t resonate. To pick up on who they really are and what they really think requires us to be self-aware enough to recognize the vibe that they portray or exude. Unfortunately our lack of awareness allows such speakers to have more sway with us than we should allow.

You bring the essence of your presence with you everywhere you go. It is the part of you that emanates from your person that reflects the type of person that you are, the way that you think about life’s experiences and the people that surround you. In a very real sense you are what you think, and it comes out in the way you speak and treat others. Consequently, increasing the power of your presence and the influence you have on others requires that you change and improve who you are at your core.

Much like a garden that needs constant weeding to produce the desired results, we need to become more aware of the thoughts, attitudes, and judgments that often derail our success. If you are interested in becoming more aware and making some changes, here are a number of questions that you should quietly consider when you have a moment to reflect.

Read continue here...Six Questions to Help You See More Clearly and Increase the Power of Your Presence