By Dianna Booher

Clear the Clichés from Your Brain

Ridding yourself of all clichés will be an impossible task. But try to get the most egregious out of your veins: "Have a nice day." (Gee, I was planning on having a rotten day.) "Safe travels." (No way! I was going right out in traffic and try to kill myself.) "I'm either on my phone or away from desk." (No kidding.) "If I can answer any further questions, please do not hesitate to call." (Really? I feel relieved. I was so nervous about calling you.) "Thank you in advance." (Too busy to bother afterward?)

Fortunately, responses will not be as sarcastic as those in parentheses--but then again you can't see what people are thinking. Express the concern or sentiment, but choose original phrasing.

That's just one of the 1,254 communication tips found in the revised and expanded edition of Communicate With Confidence, released December 3.

Ask lawyers, engineers, or systems analysts which creates the most frustration and failure--the technical part of their job or dealing with people--and they'll agree on the latter. Yet communication is the basic business act.

So how do you measure your success? Consider the response you get. Are you having the desired effect on people? When it comes to communication and connection, the question isn't, "Who needs help?" The question is, "Who doesn't?"

That's the why behind Communicate With Confidence. This revised edition covers interpersonal communication from A to Z. You'll find tips, techniques, and examples to help you:

Build credibility with coworkers and customers.
Increase productivity with clear instructions.
Give constructive feedback and coaching.
Negotiate without diminishing the other person.
Generate enthusiasm for your ideas and proposals.
Listen better so that others feel understood.
Generate meaningful or entertaining conversations.
Reduce cross-gender misunderstandings.

Communication either cements or destroys personal and work relationships. Improving communication skills, habits, and attitudes dramatically changes life--for an individual, a family, an organization, and a nation. I consider this an exciting challenge and rewarding lifetime goal.

What about you? Focus on one business or personal relationship that calls for improved communication, identify the difficulty, and then determine one change you can make in your communication to strengthen that relationship in the new year.