You don't need permission from your boss to be strong, talk like a coach, spend an hour a day managing, customize your approach to each person, tell people what to do and how to do it, track performance every step of the way, or identify and solve small problems before they turn into big problems. But you could definitely use your boss's help when it comes to holding employees accountable, imposing negative consequences on low performers, and helping high performers earn special rewards.

Keep your boss informed of your thoughts and actions as a manager. Most bosses will be delighted to hear that you want to work hard to become a better manager and will be happy to help you in your efforts.

As you fine tune your own management skills, you can start helping your boss get better at managing you.

- First, make sure you are bringing your very best to work. Arrive a little early. Stay a little late. And while you are at work, be all about the work. Your work, that is. Focus on playing the role assigned to you before you ever try to reach beyond that role. Focus on your tasks, your management responsibilities, your projects. Focus on doing them very well, very fast, all day long. If you really want to carry weight with your boss, this should be your primary focus every step of the way.

- Second, make time every day or every week to be managed. Whether your boss realizes it or not, you need to build a regular management dialogue in the same way that you are building a management dialogue with your employees.

- Third, meet with your boss only when you need to. When you meet, be prepared. Have a clear agenda with a small number of points you want to cover. And do your homework. If you want guidance, go in with a preliminary plan. If you have questions, try to have a few suggested answers for each question.

- Fourth, teach your boss how to set you up for success. Ask for clear expectations spelled out in the form of concrete goals with clear guidelines. Ask for checklists. Beg for deadlines.

- Fifth, take detailed notes in every one of your one-one-one meetings and offer to share your notes with your boss.

- Sixth, whenever you need something, ask in the form of a proposal. Don't make requests lightly, and they won't be taken lightly.