"Can't you just be a member of an organization without having to lead it? My family directs this inquiry to me periodically. From leading teams and managing a department in a Fortune 10 company, through chairing committees, sitting on boards, serving as National President in one and Chapter President in another organization, it indeed seems that my family has a point. I seldom "just join. However, I rarelyif everjoin specifically to lead.

Does this sound familiar to you? Do you find yourself in leadership positions in organizations to which you belong when you simply set out to join for your own needs / interests? Do you feel the word "yes escape your mouth when you hear your name called for a leadership role? How does this "just seem to happen time and again?

News flash: leadership does not "just happen. We exude a leadership presence and demonstrate leadership behaviors - sometimes without even knowing we do so. We "seem leaderish (not a real word, mind you) when we interact with people. We encounter conditions we want to change, then question who are we to complain unless we actively work on solutions. We receive help when we seek it and feel a calling to give back to and help others. Other people "see us as leaders before we intend to lead.

Another flash: we are neither "born leaders nor "natural leaders. Yes, we are born with whatever gene structures enable us to develop our personalities, learn skills, and be who we are. Our environments, experiences, and the people we encounter throughout our lives influence us consciously and subconsciously, shaping how we interact with others and view ourselves. Since my credentials exclude certifications as a social psychologist or biologist, this is as deep as I go with the born and natural conjectures.

I submit that we learn leadership skills, practice them until they are part of our very essence, feel internal satisfaction with being a leader, and enjoy external recognition. Through all of this we must EARN THE PRIVILEGE of garnering people's respect and causing them to follow us. Those of us for whom the above combine and intersect float to the top of the groups we join in the way oil floats to the top of a container of water. Some of us seemingly "just have to lead because we are leaders. A bit clich and egotistical, yet my experiences bring me to these leadership observations.

Enough with the observations. Let's get to the really helpful stuff. If you ARE a leaderwhether or not you hold a formal title that says you arewhat is it that makes you so? If you WANT TO BE a leaderhowever you perceive yourself to be right nowwhat must you do to "be one? Leadership tips, guidance, advice, and lessons abound in a plethora of printed, audio, and visual media. Seminars, courses, and degrees bestow a range of leadership certifications.

The following are my top five ways to earnand maintainthe privilege of serving in leadership roles.
" Keep "others first.
" Take ownership and responsibility.
" Let it go.
" Have passion and pride.
" Maintain perspective.

What&and you thought I would list specific steps to take? Specific steps are your responsibility to figure out. "What to do is what you figure out for your specific situation. "How to be a leader is what I convey here.

Keep "others first.

You have to be a "people person; other-centric, to like beingand to bean effective leader. You might lead a project where you are responsible for creating or selling a product, yet the project or product is but an effort put forth by people. Being a people-person does not mean you must be an extrovert personality, nor does it mean you must give up your worldly goods to devote your life to others. Being a people-person means that you somewhat enjoy and have skills for interacting with other people. It means you make decisions based on the good of the organization or group; that you consider "others over your own needs in your leadership role. (See "Maintain Perspective for your own needs.)

To be a leader of one (self) is to take initiative; to be a leader of more than one is just thatbeing a leader of people.

Take ownership and responsibility.

Own the situations for and conditions under which you lead. When you step up to lead you represent the people, the organization, the output, and the situations with which you associate. That means you take responsibilityand blame if applicablefor outcomes and results. That means you give credit to "your people, and recognize them accordingly, for their contributions and input.

When asked to give input or feedback, comment on, offer suggestions for, or simply respond to communications, respond. Follow through with replies. Offer your insights and perceptions (with permission to do so). Answer queries in a timely manner. Return phone calls and notes. Show that other people can rely on you when they need your input. Be honest with howand whenyou can best respond.

Let it go.

I pride myself in my ability to multi-task. I like that I see to details and check "complete on my checklists. People tell me that I am thorough and organized; I fulfill commitments and do things well. Guess what? That is not leadership; it is management! Part of earning people's trust in you so that they will follow your lead is demonstrating that you will do what you ask others to do. Part of people's belief in what you say is your track record for success in the doing. An effective leader, however, creates conditions that tap-into the motivations of and encourages others to get them to do the doing. Effective leaders delegate the doing so that others are part of the creating.

Delegating means letting go. Realize that for positive results you cannot do everything that needs to be done. Depend on others to help you. Part of leadership is enabling others to learn and grow themselves. They do so by taking responsibility for, and doing, what you ask them to do or what they realize they need to handle. Be sure to provide adequate toolsincluding knowledge and skill-developmentin the process to set others up for success. Delegating eliminates overload on any one personespecially yourself. Letting go also helps you build the structure you need for a succession plan that carries your leadership imprint into the future.

Have passion and pride.

Unless your leadership role ties directly to your paycheck and you live month-to-month on that check, who needs the hassle of leading? If you are not passionate about your organization or cause or social network, why stay? You need passion to energize yourself, and the energy you exude is what inspires others. Sometimes your passion is all you have to keep you going.

Be proud of leading; it is a lot of work and you should feel pride in taking on the extra work. Accept praise for leading well. Do not say "yes to leadership specifically for the praise; praise is hard to come by. Ironically, if you lead because of praise, you most likely are a leader who elicits little. Relish the "thank you when you receive it. Accept applause generously. Feel good about results you help create.

Maintain perspective.

"In the scheme of things&

Keep this phrase in mind. Put your leadership in perspective. Be well-rounded in order to be effective at leading other people. In the scheme of things, family, friends, faith, profession, and fun (however you define any of these for yourself) are important to being well-rounded. Give attention to all of these aspects of life in order to maintain emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual balance.

I once had a manager who called me into his office after hearing me bemoan that I could not take vacation because "they need me around here. He had a glass of water on his desk. He told me that that glass of water was our organizationthe people and operations within. He instructed me to put my finger into the glass of water, which I did, puzzled. My finger, he noted, was me as a leader in the organization. As I watched the water displace around my finger he said that I have a significant impact within the organization just as my finger created an impact on the water in the glass. Then he asked me to remove my finger, which I did. We observed the water in the glass as it filled the gap left by my finger, now removed. My manager made the analogy that should I leave (for vacationor permanently), my impact on the organization was the same as that water that filled-in where my finger once was. Other peopleand timequickly fill-in where I leave. In the scheme of things&I took my vacation, humbled.

Remember the phrase "in the scheme of things& when you next think your leadership is of ultimate importance. You DO have an impact on your organization and your people. You CAN leave a lasting leadership legacy. You WILL change people's lives when you lead effectively. Just keep things in perspective when you believe you are indispensable.

So, Why Do You Have to Lead?

If you relate to my descriptions of being a leader then you have to lead because leadership is in your blood. You thrive on helping others develop to their potential. You like taking charge and being responsible. You get energy from effecting change and feel satisfaction when you create results. You see situations that need "fixing and cannot sit back without contributing toor initiatingthe fixes.

I am still working on an answer for my family to their question, "Can't you just be a member of an organization without having to lead it?. You can assure yours that you are not alone. My answer appears to be, "No, it seems that I must lead.

We have little choice, then, but to be the most effective leaders we can be.