Dear Merry,

I am presently responsible for HR in North America and I have been offered a new position with global HR responsibility.  At this time, I am not sure that I want the job and especially not the international travel that it would require.  I have a young family.  Would turning the offer down be career suicide?

RESPONSE:  Declining without Burning Bridges

Dear Executive,

Just because you ve been offered a promotion and it s a job you are capable of taking on, does not necessarily mean that you should.  You DO NOT have to say, "yes" to every offer that comes your way.  It s important to weight the impact of the job requirements on your family life.  If demands of the new job will not allow you to keep your commitments at home, you should feel confident declining the new position. 

As a younger leader I used to feel that it was my responsibility to go out after every career opportunity that would be considered the next logical step in my position whether that supported my personal goals or not.  What I have discovered is that you don t always have to go for the next "golden ring".  If you are stimulated by your current job and are adding value for the company, then it s perfectly fine to pass on this offer for whatever reason. Your objective should be to decline the position gracefully and to position yourself appropriately for future promotion consideration.

Here are some suggestions for making sure that you don t burn any bridges by declining:

1)      Be Grateful:  Make sure you tell your boss and others in the organization that you appreciate being considered for the position. 

2)      Keep The Door Open:  Just because you are choosing not to accept the global role at this time, does not mean you never would.  Be clear that it s a timing issue and that as your kids get older you may be willing to consider it.

3)      Renew Your Commitment to Your Current Goals & Position: This is a great time to review your vision for what you have yet to accomplish in your current position.  Meet with your boss and discuss how your current goals align you with your boss s strategic vision so that you are positioning yourself appropriately for the job you are currently in.

4)      Get Involved: Request to be part of the team that interviews potential candidates for the global role.

Your career doesn t have to be a never-ending struggle to get ahead...never resting or being satisfied with your present position.  If you like your current job and feel that you can make a contribution there - great!  Choose what is best for you and your family.

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