A Secret Path To Success

Discovering the seven stages of character development at work

When I was in my twenties, I endured an especially cruel boss while working at a law firm near Atlanta. I also experienced harassment from a female co-worker who was 20-years my senior while working at a manufacturing plant in the Midwest. In my thirties, a difficult leader denied me a reasonable pay increase and, later, I was disillusioned by the behaviors of seemingly entitled employees. In my forties, I suffered the mighty wrath of a toxic coworker. 

It certainly sounds like I was tortured and lived to tell the tale. To be honest, there were moments when I thought that was the case, and I felt like I was living through an endurance contest! I sometimes speculated that each of the individuals involved in those situations stood in the way of any fulfillment I hoped to achieve from my hard work. Worse yet, they were obstacles to my success.
 

As satisfying as it was to blame others for my frustrations, something deep inside told me that I was missing a larger and more significant understanding of those events. I was nearly fifty years old before that realization crystalized for me. After years of study and observation, I finally recognized the clear and compelling character development stages that I and others moved through in the workplace. 

By understanding the seven stages and their predictable order, I could make sense of the challenging, lousy, or baffling situations that I experienced. Rather than seeing them as obstacles, difficult leaders and coworkers became dynamic instruments in the development of my mental and moral qualities, or, succinctly, my character. 

Ultimately, when we’re able to contextualize our experiences rather than personalize them, we become more objective and self-observant, which enhances our ability to learn more about ourselves. In my case, when I was able to identify the stages of character development, I could chart my development over the years based on my responses to workplace challenges. 

I marked the meaningful maturation of my character over time through the natural sequence of the seven stages, which I named: Beginning, Yuckiness, Fear, Authenticity, Boundaries, Love, and Exit. In vivid detail, I recall my entry into the world of work – my Beginning stage – at 12-years of age, first at a local campground, next at a small restaurant, and then at a drugstore in my hometown. By the time I was 18, I learned to be teachable, which prepared me for the next stage.

The Yuckiness stage brought with it the stunning realization that people – especially bosses and co-workers – can be jerks! Learning how to be observant and to pay attention to other humans in the workplace eventually led me to the Fear stage. During the Fear stage, I endeavored to protect myself from the yuckiness of others. I learned to be cautious and thoughtful about how I interacted with others at work.

Finally, during the Authenticity stage I was ready to be myself. I had the skills and awareness to navigate the work world effectively. I learned to be real, to be authentic. I thought that I had at last found a perch from which I would achieve the greatest sense of fulfillment from my work.

But I was wrong.

It was still necessary, for the growth of my character, to move through another stage, the Boundaries stage. Boundaries not only helped me to understand what was “mine” and what was “not mine,” but they were also crucial for protecting my ability to remain authentic. 

It was only after identifying the need for healthy boundaries, how to set boundaries, and how to exercise them in the workplace that I was ready and able to move toward the Love stage. Today, I am still actively growing within the Love stage – constantly discovering more opportunities to develop my character and to be of service in meaningful ways.

Eventually, I will carry the wisdom of the Love stage with me into the Exit stage. I will leave the world of work, at which point I will learn to be peaceful and grateful for all that I experienced, gained, and gave during my years in the workforce. I will take my well-developed character out into the post-work world with peaceful heart, a powerful mind, and a grateful spirit.

We have the option to use our work lives as a platform – perhaps one among many in our lives – to help us achieve our fullest potential. The stages of character development, which I refer to as the BY FABLE model, provide a predicable path toward character growth and professional fulfillment. This model offers a guide and markers indicating where to focus our intention and efforts to maximize our growth.

Without the stages of character development to provide context, bumps in the road and all sorts of troubles can seem random. We might feel helpless to change or improve anything within our jobs or our professional performance. Rudderless, confused, or overwhelmed, we could end up perceiving ourselves as victims of lousy jobs instead of the powerful and promising people we are. In reality, we’re individuals fully capable of using every experience in our work lives to develop our mental and moral qualities to a greater degree. 

Gradually, as our character continues to develop, we see the results in our evolving decisions, actions, and behaviors at work. Most of us are impatient and want results now, but we move through each stage on our own timetable, and mine isn’t the same as yours. However, each stage takes time and has its own demands. In fact, the farther we’ve traveled along the BY FABLE model, the more complex and challenging the development requirements become and the longer it takes to absorb and apply the moral or lesson of each stage before we’re ready to advance fully into the next stage. 

The challenges are worth it, though, because continual character growth is the foundation for success. Each stage of development builds upon the prior stages, and the more advanced we are coming out of each stage, the better equipped we are to make decisions that best serve our values, strengths, and interests. Those decisions lead us to greater fulfillment. And, the more fulfilled we are by our work, the more engaged and energized we are about our work, leading to greater opportunities for success.

Between you and me, I believe I would have felt much more empowered throughout my career had I been aware of the seven stages of character development at work. I would have better understood the growth opportunities inherent within exasperating, stagnant, and even painful work situations. Now, having unwittingly navigated the stages throughout my career, part of my Love stage service is to reveal the BY FABLE model to you as a roadmap to greater fulfillment and success at work. So, how will you grow forward?

Terri Jacke is author of IS THIS A LOUSY JOB OR IS IT ME? A Real-Life Guide For Achieving Sucess At Work, a seasoned organizational development consultant, and founder of Inspired Training Institute, Inc. She holds an MS in Applied Leadership For Teaching and Learning from The University of Wisconsin.   Visit www.inspiredtraining.net  Connect Terri Jacke