Here's How To Sharpen Your Emotional Intelligence Skills

Has the correlation between empathetic leadership and revenue-building gotten thicker during the pandemic?

Before the pandemic cast its spell on the world, John Berkus (name changed) swore by his night job. A bell boy in a small hotel in Chicago, he had taken this up as he needed that extra money to pay his bills. During the day, he was working at a leading corporate office as an office assistant. When John was given a pay hike in his day job, his friend asked John if he would quit doing night shifts. It had been quite taxing, working two jobs for months. “No way,” said John, and explained, “Agreed, I’ve got a good hike in a place where no one knows my name, but I will not leave my post as a bell boy. Not yet. Every evening when I go to the hotel, exhausted and spent, I feel I’ve come home. The manager, my boss, asks me how I’m doing and waits to hear my reply. He genuinely cares for me.” After the pandemic, John values his manager more.

What does it take for employees to be this loyal and committed to their jobs? They need four basic attributes - intellectual stimulation; a culture where they get to contribute for a larger purpose; an atmosphere where they feel understood, heard, and valued; and one where they are allowed to be real people, so when they falter, they can rise. If their senior management knows their job well and has high emotional intelligence, all these parameters can be met.

What do companies need? A year-on-year rise in revenue, customer loyalty, goodwill, and the power to make an impact and difference in the world. All these variables can be acquired if their seniors are well equipped to handle teams, conflict, and customer satisfaction. Here again, what is one of the most crucial factors for effective management? Emotional intelligence.

In his book, Working With Emotional Intelligence, noted author and leading psychologist, Daniel Goleman, cites the Harvard Business School research: EQ counts as twice as much as IQ (Intellectual Quotient) and technical skills.

Taking cues from this statistic and umpteen similar scientific studies, many organizations are focusing on their employees’ mental health conditions. More so during the pandemic. Though it is a well-intentioned move, is this philosophy truly being practiced at ground zero? What are the steps that companies need to take to weave and implement this culture in their workplace environments?

One of the key aspects of Emotional Intelligence is being self-aware. It is about being connected to your authentic self. At work, many times you are submerged in the busyness of doing. You lose track of how you are feeling. How, then, can you blend with your core being? It starts with being conscious of your breath. After a few deep breaths, when your mind calms down, you can get in touch with who you truly are. It is about getting out of the doingness and being soaked in the beingness. To cull this concept into actionable steps, let’s see how you can get more self-aware (and therefore sharpen your Emotional Quotient skill).

Step 1: Take a few deep breaths to calm your mind. Put your palm on your heart or any place on your body where you can feel your pulse. Observe the rhythm of its beat. Within a few moments in stillness, you will recognize the pattern. From the physiological, let us scan the psychological aspect. Now that your mind is still and calm, how are you feeling? If you are still looking for that feeling, take a few more deep breaths. You will reach the stage of serenity soon.

Step 2: When you are in this calm zone, think how you would like to be treated by people around you - at home and at work. This is an exercise about being aware of things that matter most to you. If need be, write them down.

If you are a team player, think about how you would like your manager to interact with you. If you are a boss, how would that equation be with respect to your teammates?

Step 3: Go back to gauging your pulse rate. When you reach a state of calmness, think of incidents or aspects that cause you to be sad, glad, mad, and scared. These are the four fundamental domains of EQ. In the recent past, some scientists have added fear and disgust. When you recall incidents that set off dense emotions in you, observe how your pulse rate increases. This allows you to recognize when you get stressed. Using this approach allows you to acknowledge when you are not in a state of reaction and stress. These are your triggers. Jot them down.

You may wonder why these exercises are important as a professional. Unless you are aware of who you truly are and what pushes your buttons, how will you deal with your emotions when a similar situation arises? As a team player or leader, it is vital for you to be aware of what attributes put you off or get you excited.

Now that you know your strengths and limitations in a much clearer manner, it will be easy to navigate through your feelings and emotions when they surface during a challenging situation. This kind of self-management is crucial in the growth of EQ.

The ongoing pandemic has affected people all over the world in more ways than humankind could have anticipated. While a tangible loss is easily detectable, there are innumerable complex feelings and emotions that are difficult to process. Depending on each one’s personality, some team members will be open and articulate about the cause(s) or source(s) of their concern(s). There will be many others who may be too scared to acknowledge their fears and anxieties. These unrecognized patterns may manifest as incongruent actions in the workplace. As a team player/leader, pay close attention to them. Inculcate an ability to read such cues, and act empathetically. You cannot be socially aware if you are not self-aware. So, start with being your authentic self.

Studies have proven how the use of Emotional Quotient has altered bottom line changes in various aspects of performance. There has been an increase in productivity, a decrease in absenteeism, and workers’ compensation grievances.

Lastly, in the biological field, Respiratory Quotient (RQ) is the ratio of how much carbon dioxide is released when a certain volume of oxygen is inhaled in respiration. When we are stressed, we tend to take shorter breaths. This makes the blood more acidic, thus impairing our thinking.

In a toxic workplace, employees are always stressed. This compromises their cognitive skills. They are unable to function to their fullest potential. As they are not as sharp as they ought to be, the outputs are sub-optimal. The outcome? The other RQ (Revenue Quotient - let’s call it that), gets adversely affected.

Lee-Ann Mascheranus, a senior manager in a leading realty firm in the US, confirms this pattern. “This is especially evident during the pandemic. When I was vulnerable, I performed better when my seniors empathized with me. When I replicated this behavior with my teams, they outperformed. This, despite conditions being challenging during Covid.”

Bottom line: Organizations will see a spike in their Revenue Quotient if their management adapts a style of leadership that exercises a blend of head and heart. In an environment where employees can flourish and/or fail without any fear of judgment or adverse repercussions, there will surely be a surge of productivity. People will thrive in an ambiance of bonhomie. This happy place will provide them the much-needed strength they need to deal with situations in other areas of their lives.

An empathetic leader can be a pivotal influence in the lives of many, especially during the pandemic. A strong and able leader can exude hope and happiness to those professionals looking for these facets now. Like Michelle Obama said, “You may not always have a comfortable life, and you will not always be able to solve all of the world’s problems at once, but don’t ever underestimate the importance you can have because history has shown us that courage can be contagious, and hope can take on a life of its own.”