APQC recently spoke with Mary Jo Asmus, owner and operator of Aspire Collaborative Services LLC, about how leaders can promote civility in the work place. Aspire Collaborative Services LLC is an executive coaching firm established to work with leaders and teams who are smart and want increased focus on the things that will make them extraordinary. Read Mary Jo Asmus’ Blog or follow her on Twitter at @mjasmus.

Learn more about leadership development from APQC’s Leadership Deficit Research Report.

Mary, you have talked about the need for leaders to become aware about incivility in the work place. In our survey, respondents said leaders show plenty of focus on cost and the bottom line. You talked a little bit about how Cisco estimated incivility costs them $12 million a year. Cisco saw the problem and dealt with it head-on. Why don’t more companies connect incivility to the bottom-line and become aggressive in improving it?

Incivility may not be addressed for the very reasons you’ve mentioned, plenty of attention to the bottom-line without recognition that the soft skills impact it to a significant degree. There are plenty of studies out there that show this.

Even if companies aren’t placing direct emphasis on unacceptable behavior, it is often being addressed by individual leaders through the feedback they provide and the way they model respect and civility themselves. I have great hope that the next generation of C-suite executives will recognize that the bottom line isn’t just about “doing” and making the numbers but it’s also about the behavior of the employees who are working in the organization.

Even when a company is making its numbers, I think about the wasted potential of the organizations who could go above and beyond their targets if only the individuals populating those organizations were more focused on treating each other as if they matter. As globalization marches on, employees will find that their options to work in more humane workplaces are exponentially increased and the cost of turnover alone could put civility front and center in companies.

In our survey, one of the top leadership deficiencies was self-awareness. One of your key points on improving civility is for leaders to be self-aware. In your experience, what makes people desire self-awareness in their leaders so much?

Self-awareness is the foundation for the age-old journey of our species to better themselves as individuals. When we become more self-aware, we can become more focused on our strengths and gaps. Leaders who do so know where to place their attention then to improve themselves and to use their strengths. Not only is self-awareness good for the self, but it becomes foundational to understanding others.

How does a leader who isn’t self-aware develop the skills to become more so?

There are lots of things a leader can do to become more self-aware. They can ask for feedback, participate in 360 instruments and self-assessments like Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and self-observe their own behavior in real time as they go about their day (in other words, they can be more mindful and reflective).

Of course, I’m a big fan of leaders having an executive coach when they want to become more self-aware and “up their game.” A good executive coach can be a guide through the maze of what might be holding them back and how to move forward to become the best they can be. Most coaches will begin the process with some kind of self-awareness tools and then assist the leader to develop a plan to use their strengths and close their gaps.

Read more of APQC's interview with Mary Jo Asmus here.