By Dr. Cassi L. Fields
LeT© Corporation
www.cassifields.com
The General Petraeus scandal, which recently topped news headlines, unnervingly reminds us that intimate relationships in the workplace do happen. The work environment is created to attract people who share many significant ideas and activities. Employees in one organization may be typically interested in the same kind of work, business relationships, organizational culture and geographic location. They may also possess similar knowledge, skills and abilities….and even partake in office gossip. This type of close environment is perfectly conducive for intimacy and infidelity because in the office, employees’ interests tend to overlap more.
Managers in today’s office environment may find that resolving personnel issues are the most challenging aspect of their jobs. It can be difficult to deal with employees who are late to work or submit assignments, argue with other employees, lack attention to detail, undermine the company mission, have trying personality traits, contribute less than others, etc. Imagine when managers must also deal with romantic relationships in the office – especially when there is a “no fraternization” policy, but no tangible proof to back suspicions. Romantic relationships in the office could likely compromise business productivity. The saying that “one should separate personal from professional” is accurate. Once personal issues enter the workplace, it may distract from the job at hand. Typically, the distraction can be contagious and affect many employees.
Most of us wish that, when two people become attracted to each other on the job, they would have the self-discipline to stop in their tracks. Psychologically, this is impossible for most people. A strong attraction, or even love, creates a period of heightened hormones and neurotransmitters that change the behavior of a person in that state. As we have all witnessed in the news lately, that period can last for days, months or years. Romantically interested co-workers should hold off making any decisions until the feelings of passion diminish. Employees are likely to make more irrational decisions than usual, while in the throes of passion, because it contributes to a feeling of invincibility.
Although CEOs know romantic relationships in the office will happen, the best practice is for organizations to implement policies that discourage romantic relationships in the workplace. The policies should shun personal romantic relationships on the job. In addition, these policies should offer practical ramifications, if possible, including a physical separation between the two individuals, such as placing the persons in question’s workstations on two different floors of a building, or even better, in two different geographic locations.
Public safety organizations, and other organizations dealing with safety and security, have managed this issue for many years. They usually have a policy that frowns upon romantic relationships on the job. In addition, they will assign the two employees involved in a relationship to two different stations and/or two different work shifts so that they do not work together. They usually disallow a person of a higher rank to fraternize with lower ranking individuals, which is a good practice - as this type of behavior often leads to the lower-level employee feeling harassed, and likely ending in sexual discrimination litigation.
In each of the situations discussed previously, the romantic relationships were known publically. When the relationship is a secret, the work environment is put at additional risk. In the case of General Petraeus, his secret relationship had the potential to compromise national security. In a case where an employee is having a relationship with a client or some other business relationship, a conflict of interest may arise that could destroy the business relationship. There are many reasons employees might elect to carry on a secret relationship. They may realize, for example, the potential consequences of their actions, they know that they are violating an anti-fraternization work policy, or they are carrying on an extra-marital affair. They fear retribution.
Employers should offer some alternatives to individuals who are involved in secret or public romantic relationships. The best alternative is an employee assistance program in which one or both of the involved employees receive help in ending the relationship if they ‘want out’. Other alternatives include assisting the involved employees with finding a new job or relocating to a new geographic location. If the employer can protect the involved employees’ personal information, then the likelihood of the employees asking for help increases dramatically.
Romantic relationships in the workplace often create barriers to advancement. Reputations are often ruined. In the cases of General Petraeus and Paula Broadwell, they will be limited in the type of work they can do in the future…..they have created their own glass ceilings.
The LeT© Corporation offers products and services to assist individuals in achieving a job or career advancement, and assists organizations in hiring and diversity awareness. An organizational and industrial psychologist, Dr. Cassi L. Fields has worked in the performance assessment industry for more than 20 years. Dr. Fields founded the LeT© (Limited Exposure Theory) Corporation, which explains why barriers to advancement exist and suggests that some – most often females and those from disadvantaged backgrounds – lack access to the vital information/knowledge they need to get a job or advance in their careers. This creates barriers to success, creating the infamous “glass ceiling.”
