NUMBER THREE
“For the most part, most people are trying to do the best they can, most of the time.“

Few of us ever really want, or intend, to be ‘difficult’. More often, ‘being difficult’ with others is simply an unfortunate result of our misdirected efforts to take care of ourselves, to protect from real or imagined threats to our possessions, self-esteem or personal power. (After all, we know that sometimes the best defense seems to be a good offense.)

Could it be that, when we are being difficult, rather than trying to take something away from someone, or get something, we may actually be trying (sometimes desperately) to keep from having something taken away?

If that is true then, perhaps, one way in which we might make our interactions with other ‘difficult people’ more productive, and less volatile, is to try to remember that s/he may simply be trying to protect him/herself from harm. We need not to try to figure out what, why or how that may be. By simply carrying a basic level of empathy and understanding into any interaction, we are more likely to produce a better outcome or, at the very least, come away with a more positive outlook regarding our own management of the situation.

Next Week: modified serenity prayer & summary

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George "Bud" Wassell, MS, LPC, CEAP
Director, Solutions EAP
213 Court Street
Middletown, CT 06457
800-526-3485
fax: 860-704-6221
www.solutions-eap.com<http://www.solutions-eap.com>