What’s in a Word? Part IV
by Rebecca Harris, MA, LPC
February’s E-Tips have focused on the words we use, the messages they convey to others, and the impact our self-talk or dialogue has on our own thoughts and actions.

In week one I compared the old saying of “You are what you eat”, to the belief that “you are what you think”. If you eat healthy foods, and live a healthy lifestyle, you can expect that your quality of life will be better. The same is true for what you feed your mind.

Much research has been done to prove that you can alter brain functions by mentally challenging or exercising your brain to think differently about a situation and therefore respond accordingly based on how you perceived the message. When we conscientiously choose to succeed, then using words like “I can’t help it”, become excuses. More accurately might be that I didn’t choose to take responsibility for my choices.

When we can hear what we say about our problems, it’s easy to see why we can get bogged down by the mere thought of tackling the project. Negative remarks we use with words such as “I’ll never finish this up and get out of here in this lifetime”, will only reinforce that you are helpless. It’s hardly a way to boost your enthusiasm and effort.

Instead, remember you do have choices. Word them so that you are honest about your expectations and outcome of the situation. Truly you will get the work done, so instead of over- dramatizing, simply state that you feel overwhelmed by the amount of work, that you will accomplish what you reasonably can tonight, and then move on. As hard as it may be, spend some time listening to yourself talk this week. Are you making excuses, or perceiving situations as negative and yourself a victim of circumstances?

To make a choice about your life means to select, after consideration, an option to proceed. If there are situations in your life that bog you down, maybe it’s time to choose to get a fresh perspective on them.

“I do not believe in fate that falls on men however they act, but I do believe in fate that falls on them unless they act”. ~Author Unknown.

So, what’s in the words you use? Are you “trying” or “doing”?
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George "Bud" Wassell, M.S., LPC, CEAP
Director, Solutions EAP
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